


Fusion

by Andwecanmessaround



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F, Pearlrose, Polyamorous Character, eventual pearlnet, poly rose
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-07
Updated: 2015-10-16
Packaged: 2018-04-13 09:20:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4516422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Andwecanmessaround/pseuds/Andwecanmessaround
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's  F U S I O N  Sapphire! What's more personal to us than fusion?!<br/>______________</p><p>Fusion was easy as breathing for Garnet – instinctual - no doubt because she was a fusion herself. She was an obvious choice to teach Pearl. The only problem was the instant the two tried she was hit with the overwhelming tide of Pearl’s utter devotion to Rose Quartz.</p><p>Garnet's experiences of fusion with Pearl and Rose.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The first time Garnet ever fused with another gem was at Rose’s request. To help prepare for fusion during battle if a rebellion ever did break out against the diamond authority. Of course back then Rose _Quartz_ had been Rose _Diamond_ \- so to say Garnet had been startled when the imposing silhouette of one of the four leaders of gem society appeared at the entrance of her room was more than an understatement. Officially here to check on her new soldiers, she didn’t stay long, only asked how she felt about her new posting, smiled, shook hands and left. Garnet remembered feeling Rose push a slip of paper into her gloved hands. 

There was only a time and place. Courtyard. Second moon’s peak. 

She’d unfused - it had been harder to stay together during disagreements back then, as a fairly new fusion - and when she reformed Garnet decided to go, despite Sapphire’s worry this was a trap. Looking back, Garnet could hardly remember what it was like not to have future vision – her and Sapphire’s shared power hadn’t awakened until a few centuries later, amidst a chaotic battlefield during the fight for Earth.

____________

Rose _knew._

Garnet tensed, ready for a fight, but there was none. Rose had smiled, calmly assured Garnet that she was a friend. Then ushered her inside and explained the reason for her secretive summons. 

Fusion was easy as breathing for Garnet – instinctual - no doubt because she was a fusion herself. She was an obvious choice to teach Pearl. The only problem was the instant the two fused she was forced to contend with the overwhelming tide of Pearl’s utter devotion to Rose Quartz. Trying to find Pearl’s mind and connect with it amongst all those strong emotions was like being a small ship tossed around the ocean in a storm, almost settling and getting their bearings to head to port, only to be thrown off course by another crashing wave. They tried many times but never managed to bind to each other’s light. 

__________

The closest they’d come was when Garnet attempted to use love as common ground for their fusion, and they’d managed to form a shared consciousness. Garnet’s triumph at feeling themselves accept each other’s light was soon overshadowed with worry. Pearl’s love for Rose was intense, but unlike Ruby and Sapphire’s love, it was also turbulent, fraught with complications and murky with a lack of communication. Rose loved Pearl back, of course, she was full of love and she devoted herself to all of her lovers. But despite her kindness, Rose had been born powerful, raised as an elite member of society. Rose would never understand what it was like to be a lower gem and forced to be a cog in Homeworld society. Wouldn’t understand how Pearl’s lack of self esteem had been fed into her since they she was formed, how Pearl had latched onto her leader and based her entire worth around protecting and caring for them. Pearl would never tell Rose any of her worries or issues with the relationship – she was too worried the diamond would easily turn her back on her or replace her. Rose may say she saw them as equals but the pearl clearly didn’t share that view… 

In the long run Garnet could only see one or both of the pair getting hurt. She accidentally released those thoughts before she could stop herself, unused to keeping secrets in fusion, and she felt them drift out of her mind and into the shared consciousness. 

_Shards!_ Garnet cursed, hurriedly trying to find a way to distract her, but it was too late. Sardonyx knew now and so would Pearl. There was a bitter spike of resentment and grief from the other gem, and Sardonyx was forcibly pulled apart by Pearl’s hurt. 

Garnet advised Rose that fusing with Pearl was too unstable and thar was unlikely to change any time soon, it was not a sound battle strategy, and her leader had eventually nodded wearily and agreed. 

“I’d hoped to keep her off the battlefield altogether, but I knew she would never agree to it. Fusion was my only hope to keep her safe.”

Garnet had grimaced at how casually Rose spoke of fusion as if it were just a tool, but reminded herself that this was a diamond and bit her tongue.


	2. Chapter 2

Just a boring action bit, no romance here. (Omg I suck at fight scenes they are so hard to write yikes)

_______

The rebellion began just a few decades later, and Garnet ignored the orders to abandon her post and instead followed Rose into battle, joined by large swathes of the former pink diamond’s staff and soldiers. Every day new droves of gems arrived, defectors from one of the other three leaders. The diamond trio had clearly underestimated how seductive the promise of freedom was to the maltreated lower classes of gems, though the bulk of Rose’s army was composed of former servants and lower class gems, the combat trained Kindergarten gems had loyalty to the Diamond authority ingrained into them since their creation and most had never seen anything but war, so defection from soldiers born off Homeworld was few. Rose’s army may be bigger but it was far weaker. Half of these gem rebels couldn’t even summon a weapon when they arrived. 

The odds may have been slim, but for the first time in recorded gem history, there was a large scale rebellion against the leaders. And Rose’s army had a trick up their sleeve. The pink diamond came to learn fusion better than any other gem Garnet had met over those centuries, and soon Garnet was training Gems how to fuse, splitting into Ruby and Sapphire to demonstrate. Meanwhile the pearl was training them how to summon weapons. Garnet sat in on a few of Pearl’s lessons. She’d never been able to summon her weapon herself, but was more than proficient in the use of axes. A gem weapon would be far more useful though - it could regenerate if knocked out of your hands and it would probably be stronger than the steel infantry were equipped with. 

The second time Garnet fused with another gem it was Rose, and it was the first battle of the war. 

_______ 

Although it was maybe more of an uprising than a battle. Overnight, the city erupted into violence. Garnet woke in her bunk to the sound of thunder and looked outside to see most of the army climbing down the wall and joining the group marching toward the city. Apparently some gems had been over eager and begun the rebellion early. She cast an eye around the small stone cubbyhole she’d lived in since being assigned here, one of hundreds set into the huge grey wall she and the other soldiers of her unit lived in, next to the mansion of Rose Diamond. The only furniture in the small cave was the bunk and a desk on the far wall, both carved out of the stone walls and set into the floor. There was no door, but Garnet had no possessions to be stolen, except for the thick leather gloves she wore. 

Garnet hesitated, looking down at the gloves, before slowly sliding them off, revealing her gems. She felt almost naked with them exposed in public, but after a couple seconds pause she placed the leather gloves down resolutely on the desk and turned to stride out of the cave and into the storm, onto the long wooden ledge outside that spanned the length of the top floor. 

_________

Rose’s mansion - and the barracks wall behind it -lay on a hill at the end of a valley , the nearby city lay less than a mile downhill, framed by the huge stone cliffs on each side. From her vantage point Garnet could see the whole city below them, it’s skyline dominated by several huge thin green glass door metal spires which stretched into the murky green sky, glowing a neon green with each flash of lightning. Garnet could see a few large concentrations of orange dotted about the city. There was a rumble and as she watched one of the green spires collapsed, no doubt showering huge glass chunks over several streets. She nimbly ran along the wooden ledges and slid down the ladders constructed along the water until she was on the ground. She passed a few other gems on her way, and they nodded at each other, but Garnet didn’t join them. She had her orders. 

She didn’t bother with the gate, simply vaulted the high walls into the courtyard with ease. Rose wasn’t there, but the Pearl was,with a group of around 20 gems – her best students. They’d all successfully summoned their weapons, despite the stress. Garnet felt a pang of embarrassment. Ruby could summon her weapon, but Sapphire and Garnet had never managed yet. The Pearl handed her a battleaxe, barely glancing at her. 

“Where’s Rose? I was supposed to be with her.”

“There was a leak, Blue Diamond found out about the plan for tonight so we were forced to move an hour early. This is a disaster, communications are down, the city is in chaos!” Pearl wrung her hands. 

“She’s alone?” Garnet noticed the pearl was shaking slightly and put a hand on their shoulder to steady them. 

“Yes. You need to hurry Garnet. I’ll come with you.” 

“No. You and your group need to secure the ships.” Pearl opened her mouth to protest and Garnet raised a hand, silencing her “your task is too important to be left to chance.”

The pearl nodded reluctantly, before turning back to her group.

___________

Garnet managed to catch a ride to the city from a hover car piloted by a Jade , who was planning to wait near the docks till the fighting was over. She could feel Ruby’s anger at the gems cowardice, but quieted her down by pointing out it was their choice. Rose did not conscript, she disagreed with it entirely, and Garnet was inclined to agree - forcing someone to fight was not only cruel, but produced poor soldiers. 

From where the Jade dropped them off it was a short sprint up and over the rooftops of the shiny chrome sector of the richest gems in the city, to the spiky black metal mansion that was the residence of Blue Diamond. Rose’s former closest friend had clearly allowed Rose in through the gate, because the huge metal fence was undamaged. Though Garnet could only assume that the Blue Diamond had refused Rose’s offer to join them in rebellion judging from the fighting. 

She could hear the sound of metal clashing within, and with a stroke of the axe Garnet cleaved a large hole in the fence. Her battleaxe was standard issue, as tall as Garnet with two silver blades, well balanced but nowhere near the quality of higher class weapons. Rose’s sword cut cut through it with little difficulty. Garnet wondered what kind of weapons Blue Diamond had at their disposal as she deftly slipped through the fence hole and onto a floor of blue glass, glued into rock. Garnet wondered how many hours of gem labour were wasted on this luxury. She crept round the corner cautiously, pulling back behind the wall as she saw movement. 

Rose was in the courtyard, engaged in a sword duel so fast Garnet could barely make out her arms. Her opponent was just as fast, if not even quicker. Rose took a step back after a particularly rapid flurry of metal, and as her opponent stepped into a patch of moonlight Garnet froze. Despite herself Garnet stopped dead, a cold weight in her stomach at the sight of Blue Diamond. The sight of a Diamond in battle, this close up, was something most gems would never experience. It was awe inspiring, terrifying even. Garnet felt like her legs were locked to the ground. How could she possibly hope to help Rose fight a _diamond?!_ Blue Diamond was even taller than Rose. As a fusion Garnet was used to being one of the tallest (and strongest) gems in a room but both diamonds dwarfed her in comparison. Blue Diamonds rapier darted forward towards Rose’s chest, only to be repelled backwards by the sudden appearance of a huge pink shield materialising on the pink gems left arm. Blue Diamond staggered backwards as the shockwave from the shield’s vibrations sent her reeling. Garnet saw her chance and forced herself to move, leaping forward from behind cover, to Rose’s side. A rose bloomed from the ground between them, turning into a bubble that enclosed them both. 

“Garnet,” Rose smiled and the fusion felt some of the icy fear leave her body. “Fuse with me?” Garnet nodded, as she stepped into the larger gem’s arms. Rose span her deftly and for the first time Garnet got to see her gems glowing, not hidden under the gloves. 

Fusing with Rose was like being enveloped in a warm hug. The resulting rush in power was dizzying in its intensity. Together, they were unstoppable. Blue Diamond raised their rapier (Garnet wondered if that were their gem weapon, or just a custom sword designed for her like Rose’s sword.) and Rose’s sword knocked it out of their hands with one stroke, whilst the battleaxe cracked down hard on the diamond’s spiky helmet reading it in two. Another arm summoned the shield and dealt the opposing gem a swift blow to the neck. 

To Garnet, Ruby and Sapphire’s confusion, the fusion didn’t feel like Garnet did, but more like Rose and the other gems were both ordering someone to do something, and those commands were instantly carried out. 

_This is what a fusion formed purely for battle feels like._ Rose informed them. 

The thought made Garnet a little uncomfortable – had this been what she’d been like the first time she formed? A tool? She felt the answer from her component gems instantly. 

_No. Never._

Garnet had never been able to communicate with Ruby and Sapphire before. She had access to the memories and thoughts they allowed each other, but sometimes she forgot they existed outside of her. She could feel their essence in the light that constructed this fusion, brushing against bits of Rose’s light and each other’s. Where Ruby and Sapphire’s light crossed over each other in this form, in the spaces between, there was Garnet. 

Blue Diamond took a few more rapid hits to the face before her form exploded outward, and with a clink, a huge blue gem fell to the blue glass mosaic floor. They stepped forward, to crush the Diamond’s gem - both the rage of Ruby and the logic of Garnet and Sapphire knew this was the right course of action so when there was a loud cry and the fusion split apart Garnet was shocked. 

“I can’t. I won’t kill. We don’t have to be like them.” Rose said, and Garnet noticed with a start that Rose was crying. 

“She’ll regenerate, and this is war.” Garnet pointed out. 

“I know Garnet.” 

Rose took a deep breath then threw the gem back down onto the floor. A small chip and crack appeared as Rose took the tip of her sword and ground the tip along the top surface, twisting it to widen the crack. 

“Will that be enough?” Garnet said dubiously. 

“It will slow the regeneration process until they can get her to one of her stores of my tears. If we had more time we should go look for them and destroy those but,” Rose dried her eyes “let’s just leave this place, we have a lot of other planets to visit on the way to Earth, and we need to get there before the kindergartens destroy it.”

Garnet shrugged and fell into step beside Rose, as they headed to the docks, where Pearl and her team had successfully secured several huge disc shaped ships and were corralling the army onto them. It had been an overwhelming victory. Taken by surprise, and without Blue Diamond ordering them what to do, the security forces had retreated, no doubt to the nearest base where they could get a message to White and Yellow Diamond about the uprising. The two were currently off Homeworld, making this the perfect time to escape. 

“I’ve never seen so many gems look so hopeful,” Rose said, watching the civilians be led onto the ships in orderly lines by Rose’s soldiers. 

“The war is far from over.” Garnet pointed out as they made their way to join the rest of the gems. 

Garnet looked over her shoulder as she boarded Rose’s private ship, for her final glimpse at Homeworld. She saw a city burning and turned her back for the last time on the world that had shamed her existence, stepping forward to an uncertain, but hopeful future. 

She fused with Rose many more times over the course of the war, and even some of the other gems, but the first time she fused with Rose was the one she remembered most vividly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a boring action bit, no romance here. (Omg I suck at fight scenes they are so hard to write yikes)


	3. Chapter 3

The second time Garnet fused with Rose was an altogether calmer affair. They were on Earth now, camped on a field preparing for an upcoming battle. Yellow Diamond’s remaining ships would be here in a few days no doubt, but the crystal gems – a name they’d adopted once the rebellions were fully underway – would be ready. They’d struck a huge victory and destroyed most of White Diamond’s fleet already as they fled the authority from planet to planet, and Rose had smashed Green Diamond to dust in a duel less than a month prior. There was a real sense the war was coming to an end now, as captured communications revealed the remaining diamond trio were beginning to think recapturing Rose Diamond and the crystal gems was more trouble than it was worth, and were considering abandoning the war and simply exiling the gems to Earth instead. No doubt a cover story would be created for the gems back in Homeworld about Rose being defeated though. Garnet sighed, feeling very pessimistic tonight despite the levity of the mood in camp after their last victory.

Three large bonfires formed a line down the centre of the camp. Most of the humans clustered around the bottom fire, while the gems remained at the top. A smaller group of both species was mingling in the middle. Rose was amiably socialising, flitting from group to group to bolster morale. The mood in camp was incredibly high, despite the losses they’d suffered to get here. Rose’s army had conviction at its back, the strength that comes from knowing you can sit back and let things continue as they were. Many gems had died, but those who remained were stronger now, more accustomed to battle. Garnet watched from the shadows, sat on a log, in the shade of some trees set a few hundred yards back from the middle fire. The celebrations were taking a mental toll, she was exhausted and she had the beginnings of a migraine in her forehead - right behind her third eye. 

Garnet just couldn’t bring herself to be optimistic with their odds against Yellow Diamond, but there was something else too. Like an ominous feeling, she knew something bad was going to happen in that battle but she couldn’t explain when or what or even why. Garnet had learned to trust her hunches though – they usually turned out right. 

There was a cheer down at the bottom fire and Garnet saw that the humans were swinging around on each other’s arms and rhythmically stamping their feet as one began to play a tune on a flute. A tall blond man, hair glowing in the firelight, was laughing uproariously with a wide grin on his face as he was pulled to his feet and dragged into the throng by some of the other humans. His eyes cast about though. Garnet knew he was looking for Rose, she’d seen him exiting her tent before. 

“Garnet! There you are!” Rose appeared in front of Garnet, startling her, silhouetted against the light of the middle fire, where the revelries had also begun to carry over, Garnet could even see the shapes of gems dancing with humans. History being made right in front of her. Sapphire must be so happy right now, Garnet thought, and sure enough she could feel a warm glow at the edge of her brain, an emotion that wasn’t quite hers but she could feel it secondhand anyway. 

“Rose.” Garnet nodded respectfully. 

“You’re getting as formal as Pearl, what’s wrong with you two lately?” Rose laughed. 

“Something’s wrong with Pearl?” Garnet flicked her eyes around in an attempt to find Rose’s second, but she was noticeably absent. Or rather _un_ noticeably absent, because Pearl hadn’t been there and Garnet hadn’t noticed, which felt like a failure to Garnet on her part, even though she supposed the two of them weren’t particularly close. 

“No she’s her usual self I’m just teasing.” Rose smiled “You seem off though Garnet, is everything ok?”

“Just a headache,” Garnet grimaced as another sharp pain flashed behind her eyes. 

“I think a dance would do us both some good. Would you care to join me?” 

“to dance with humans?” Garnet said disapprovingly, raising an eyebrow.

“You need to get to know them Garnet, they’re a wonderful species, so full of life and so passionate. Just give them a chance!” Rose offered her hand and as always Garnet melted slightly at the sight of the former diamond’s warm smile. Relenting, she took Rose’s hand. 

When fusing with other gems she took the lead without even thinking, it was instinctual, but letting Rose take the lead in this dance came just as naturally to Garnet. She felt the gems on her hands warm and glow as the pink gem dipped Garnet low, and then she was nothing but light. 

Fusing this time felt different. 

Smoky Quartz was a couple of feet taller than Rose, and instantly drew some attention from the people gathered around the fires when they emerged from the trees. She smiled warmly at them and awkwardly waved, but unlike Rose, felt slightly nervous about approaching them. One of the groups of dancing humans called her over and she approached. Though Garnet was uninterested in humans as a species, Smoky Quartz apparently, having access to all Rose’s information on the short lived life forms, had a deep curiosity of them, though her fascination was tempered slightly by Sapphire’s caution and Garnet’s disinterest. 

_We fused with Rose! Properly this time!_ Sapphire marvelled. 

Being fused with another gem was one of the few times Garnet could feel both her own personality and that of her two component gems. The other time was when Garnet became unstable, which was far less pleasant. Strangely Ruby seemed very quiet in this fusion, usually when Garnetfused with another gem Ruby was loud and ready to help the formed battle fusion fight, though Ruby’s colour scheme was the most prominent in this new fusion’s form. Smooth dark red/pink skin contrasted with black and white clothes. Rose, of course, was the most active personality in this cluster, chattering about humans to the other three (Garnet Ruby and Sapphire) already. 

Smoky Quartz’ personality existed outside of their woven light, and yet it was created by their minds. As Rose was speaking excitedly about the humans, Sapphire and Smoky Quartz grew more intrigued. Garnet, despite herself, couldn’t help but be slightly amused by the brazenness of the group surrounding Smoky Quartz, as they began measuring their hands against hers, she stared at them shyly through two pairs of dark red eyes, and she let that amusement drift out to brush Smoky Quartz’s brain. One bowed theatrically low and proffered his hand with a crooked grin and she giggled in return, gently taking the offered hand

Soon she was dancing with the humans, and as the night wore on Smoky Quartz’ inhibitions lowered, and Garnet backed her mind away and zoned out to leave the fusion with some privacy as a large group of male and female humans persuaded the gem to join them in their tent. 

Her dreams were vague, splintered fragments, but she remembered a few parts. It was a battlefield, glimmering with glass shards, and there was a bright light that swept around her and turned her to ash. She awoke as Garnet once more, and picked her way carefully through the tent, the floor covered with sleeping humans in various states of undress. Rose was still there, but Garnet wanted to exit this situation as rapidly as possible. She grimaced in distaste at the smell in the tent - she may have understood a little more about humans now after that fusion, but she still couldn’t see why Rose willingly subjected herself to being around them when they smelt this bad – breathing a sigh of relief as she stepped outside. The sun had risen, but the camp was quiet, three huge smoking piles of ash and embers were all that remained of the piles of wood they’d heaped up last night before three Rubies had lit them. There were no other Garnet’s in the camp, but several Rubies and two Sapphires. On Homeworld Rubies and Sapphires were supposed to hate each other due to a feud many generations ago. None of either gem ever talked to Garnet, going out of their way to avoid her in fact. She suspected both sides found her existence and insult, which inflamed Ruby’s temper and could lead to Garnet feeling a little hotheaded, so she tried to avoid thinking about it. 

Not sure what to do with her time, she simply returned to the copse of trees she’d been sitting in the shade of last night, sitting on the floor next to the log and closing her eyes to meditate. She heard a muffled thud and opened one eye. All was clear in the camp but it sounded like the noise had come from behind her – amongst the darkness further into the expanse of trees. Garnet flinched as there was the unmistakeable sound of splintering wood. Something or someone was in there. She hesitated. Going in alone could be dangerous – and she still couldn’t summon her weapon very often, only managing to produce her gauntlets in training a few times after a long period of relaxation. She spotted one of the humans’ swords glinting down by as it hung from a pole outside a nearby tent not even sheathed. Careless on their part, but fortunate for Garnet. Human blades were smaller and lighter than Garnet was used to, but it would function well as a long knife. She darted across and grabbed it before entering the forest, sword in hand. 

She passed on the floor quietly, trying to avoid any twigs. Her headache had gone thankfully, because whatever was in the forest was making a lot of noise. Garnet paused as she came to the edge of a clearing, where another gem was wildly slashing at a tree, screaming with each cut. 

“Have you been here all night.” Garnet said as the other gem stopped for a break, muscles shaking with exhaustion. Pearl jumped at the sound of the fusion’s voice and turned to face them. 

“Garnet! I was just training…” Pearl cast her eyes around looking for an excuse. The gem was such a terrible liar it was almost endearing. “Look, please don’t tell Rose about this.”

“That you were training?” 

“Yes! …no? That I-“ the Pearl buried their face in their hands and Garnet shifted uncomfortably. Pearl looked like she was in emotional distress, and Garnet felt like she should check on the gem, but Garnet could still remember fusing with Pearl. After last night Garnet felt pretty sure she was now part of the reason Pearl was upset. Guilt added to the dark cloud that had been hanging over the fusion since last night. 

“Do you want to train together?” Garnet said instead, and Pearl nodded eagerly at the change of subject, before finally noticing Garnet’s weapon. 

“Still can’t summon your own weapon?” Pearl said aloud, then hastily continued when all three of Garnet’s eyes narrowed, “I didn’t mean that was a bad thing, just I could teach you!” 

“Everyone’s been teaching me, I’ve been to every class you and Citrine have held.” Garnet sighed. 

“I mean just you and me, maybe that would help you more?” Garnet nodded silently, surprised. 

“Ok, I’ve seen you summon your weapon before in my class, let’s start by repeating how you did that.”

Garnet entered the clearing and gently sat cross legged on the forest floor, as Pearl mimicked Garnet’s pose sitting opposite each other. The two closed their eyes, but just as Garnet was beginning to relax, there was a buzzing noise and Garnet opened her eyes just in time to see Pearl leap to her feet yelling, pursued by a small flying buzzing thing. 

She watched, smirking, as Pearl darted through the trees pursued by the Earth creature. Pearl finally speared the tiny monster and returned to Garnet, face flushed in embarrassment ask Garnet’s amusement, before making a shy grin in return. Garnet felt a surprising fondness for Pearl at that moment. 

_Either I’m still asleep, and dreaming, or she’s not as bad as I thought._


	4. Chapter 4

The second time Garnet fused with Pearl, Rose was already there too, and as she joined with Rainbow Quartz, the resulting fusion carefully kept their mind on the mission as they set off to find whatever was in the deactivated kindergarten that had set off one of the injectors and caused an earthquake.

Pearl and Rose’s fusion was more stable than ever. Their love for each other thrummed in the light around them both, as did Ruby and Sapphire’s. Then there was her. Garnet wondered what it would be like if she were ever to find someone to love. Would Ruby and Sapphire understand? Would they fall in love with that gem too?

  
____________________________ 

The third time Garnet fused with Pearl a few millennia had passed, and everything was different. 

Pearl had been in a bad mood ever since that human left, crashing back through the fence with his van. While Rose was playing with Amethyst the next morning, the slender gem had returned to her room sullenly, and Garnet – concerned that Pearl was upset – had followed. 

“You saw the way she looked at him though Garnet?” Pearl said dejectedly, currently lying across Garnet’s lap, and drumming her fingers on Garnet’s thigh at an increasing tempo. Recognising the signs of distress, Garnet gently wrapped her fingers around Pearl’s. 

“Rose loves you.” Garnet pointed out. Pearl didn’t reply.

Garnet used to find Pearl’s constant need for reassurance irritating, but during their time on earth she’d come to realise that Pearl couldn’t help the self worth issues Homeworld had drilled into her, any more than Garnet could help the shame she’d felt once over being a fusion, and tried to soften up on the gem. Homeworld had messed all of them up, it was their fault Pearl was like this, not Pearl’s. Garnet just worried Pearl’s issues would end in her hurting someone else. 

Garnet had worked through her problems, with the support of Rose, Ruby and Sapphire. Pearl hadn’t. Even after thousands of years away from Homeworld’s toxic influence, the emotional scars were still evident. Garnet wished she knew how to help increase the slender gem’s confidence but she wasn’t like Rose - who’s attitude always overflowed with smiles, open affection and caring. Garnet was the quiet one who could see the future and hit things. No one had ever needed her support emotionally before Pearl, and this was still fairly new ground.

“We should go somewhere.” The fusion decided. 

“Go somewhere? Where exactly were you thinking of?” Pearl shifted her position, turning to face upwards and look at Garnet. 

“We could check on some of the warp pads you repaired last century, for maintenance.” Garnet said. Pearls were good at fixing things, and keeping her hands busy might take her mind off Rose and the human. 

“ Well, I suppose a change in scenery may do me good.” Pearl agreed. 

  
_________________________ 

Sadly Garnet’s idea of a relaxing break had never come to pass. They’d no sooner stepped off the warp pad in the first place they checked when they were attacked. 

A corrupted gem. The biggest they’d seen so far, with 8 arms and a long sharp tail, tipped with a blade that sparkled in the sun. Luckily Garnet had managed to distract the creature long enough for Pearl to return to the temple and fetch Rose, but even with Rose facing it head on, the corrupted beast was attacking with what seemed like a never ending flurry of blows from its multiple sharp legs. Rose was blocking them all with her shield, but couldn’t find an opening to retaliate, and Garnet and Pearl’s weapons couldn’t even pierce the iridescent plated armour that covered the monster. 

“There’s no use,” Pearl pointed out as Garnet threw yet another punch at one of its legs, only to be kicked into a tree with a careless flick of the six foot limb. Pearl hurried to her side to check on her. 

“M’ fine.” Garnet grunted, but didn’t push the smaller gem off when she began gently inspecting the gems in the fusion’s hands for damage. 

“It’s too strong for us,” the pearl murmured, and as Garnet looked down at her hands she realised she knew how they could win. She just didn’t know if Pearl would agree to it. The last time the two of them had fused hadn’t exactly been a success. 

Rose cried out and Garnet scrambled to her feet as Pearl whipped round to watch Rose struggling to repel the creature alone. Their leader seemed unharmed for now but she was being steadily pushed back now. Garnet had never seen Rose Quartz regenerate. She wasn’t sure what the group would do without the pink gem, other than fall apart. 

“ She can’t win this alone Pearl, we have to do something.” 

There was a spark of understanding in the two pale blue eyes looking up at her, and Pearl curtseyed, offering her hand to the fusion. Their dance was a little awkward at first – not sure what moves to perform since they hadn’t practiced together since before the rebellion, and rushing to fuse as fast as possible – but Garnet just moved in whichever way felt right, and as Pearl pirouetted into her arms their gems were glowing. 

She could sense the anxiety in Pearl’s light as they began to fuse. 

“Don’t worry ,” Garnet wasn’t sure if she was speaking the words aloud or thinking them, but she could feel that Pearl heard them, “we’ve both grown so much since then.”

As the destabilising lessened with the easing of Pearl’s stress, they linked minds, and there was an outwards explosion of orange light as the two twined their forms around each other. 

Sardonyx was born, and she brimmed with energy.

Not quite a stable fusion yet, she shifted back and forth between feeling like another person in their web of light, and feeling like how forming Smoky Quartz with Rose felt the first time, a puppet controlled by it’s components. As always, Ruby was eager to dive into battle, and spurred the fusion to fight. 

Sardonyx clapped their hands together with glee at the hammer they formed, combining Garnet’s gauntlets with Pearl’s spear. Though the fusion hadn’t quite developed a voice of their own yet, they managed to chortle as they flipped through the air with the weapon, landing a crushing blow on on of its legs - and detaching it from the segmented body.  
The corrupted gem screeched in Pain and Rose took advantage of its distraction to force her sword between two of the plates and rip off a section of armour, before stabbing the monster through the heart. 

Sardonyx left Rose to deal with the multiple gems that fell from the beast, whilst the new fusion stared at themselves in awe, spinning the top section of their body around and marvelling at every detail. 

_We did it!_ Pearl thought, her voice thrumming with happiness. As Sardonyx vanished her weapon, Garnet felt the flicker of the new personality disappear again, and they were back to controlling her. 

_We need to unfuse so we can check on Rose._ Sapphire pointed out, already coalescing her light with Ruby’s to allow Garnet to stay as Garnet during the split, instead of all three gems separating. 

Garnet pulled away to rapidly split the fusion, but Pearl wrapped herself closer around Garnet to compensate, and the two felt the threads of their forms slowly separate back into Pearl and Garnet again instead. 

She was glad of her shades to help hide her embarrassment when they unfused and the two were entwined around each other as if in the middle of a waltz, Pearl pressed firmly into Garnet and her eyes closed as her head leaned on Garnet’s chest. There was a brief moment where it felt like time itself had stopped, then Pearl’s eyes opened and they stepped back. Garnet lifted the hand holding Pearl’s and the smaller gem twirled under the raised arms out of the embrace. A grin tugged at Garnet’s mouth and Pearl shyly returned it, both still buoyant on the confidence and enthusiasm that being Sardonyx had entailed. Rose ran up to them, unharmed thankfully, the gems bubbled. Letting go of the pair, Rose placed one hand on Pearl’s shoulder and just like that Garnet’s good mood faded, as Pearl turned and immediately became absorbed in conversation with Rose. Pearl had this way of staring at their leader as if Rose was a star, and Pearl the lucky planet who got to orbit around her.

The fusion glanced back as she stood on the warp pad. Pearl was hanging off Rose’s arm and the two were laughing. Garnet warped back to the temple alone. 

___________________ 

That night found her taking her rage out the air on the hill over the temple. Practising her forms was as relaxing as meditation to Garnet, but allowed that aggressive side of her some release too. When she was finished the sun was peeking over the horizon, half blocked by thick dark clouds, turning the black water a grey-green. Garnet sank to the floor and sat, watching through the gaps in the clouds for the stars in the sky before they vanished for the day. Garnet had been a soldier all her life, but Sapphire had often seen a star map during her work as the personal assistant of a modestly successful Emerald( who was in charge of the kindergartens on a few planets in Rose Diamond territory). Sapphire hadn’t paid the map much mind, more focused on writing down the orders Emerald wanted her to record and repeat to the rest of the servants. Garnet wished she had. Any of the stars up there could be the blue giant that Homeworld orbited. Somewhere, light years away, life as normal was happening in gem society. 

Garnet jumped slightly when she noticed Rose sitting down beside her, She’d been so focused on her stargazing she hadn’t even heard the other gem approach. Rose said nothing, and Garnet didn’t feel like forcing a conversation. They watched the sun rise in silence until the sky was a brilliant blue and the scent of morning dew filled the air, the pleasant scene marred slightly both by the harsh calls of flocking seagulls and Garnet’s own mood. 

“You make her happy.” Rose said eventually. 

Garnet didn’t know how to respond to a sentence like that. Most gems would take the fusion’s silence as anger, and steamroll onwards with more words to fill the emptiness. Rose knew Garnet better than that, and waited. The pink gem knew that if she wanted to hear what the fusion was really thinking, she needed to give them time to collect their thoughts, and use their future vision to run through the possibilities of each reply they were considering. 

“You make her happier,” Garnet said eventually, picking at the damp grass by her side. 

“It doesn’t have to be a competition Garnet,” Rose pointed out, “You and Pearl should talk about how you feel. I’ve seen the way she looks at you, you’re good for her, and I’ve never seen you smile like that before either.” 

Confused, Garnet opened her mouth and closed it a few times. Was Rose suggesting that Garnet and Pearl..? Garnet was stunned. Then she was angry. 

“You just want the two of us occupied with each other so you won’t feel bad deserting Pearl for your newest human lover, right? I don’t know why you bother with these flings. He’ll die too soon, like they always do, and then Pearl will hop back into your arms without hesitation!” Garnet burst out then tensed, cursing Ruby internally for passing on this aggressive streak to her. 

Rose was trying to hide it by looking away, but her whole face had crumpled. Garnet wanted to kick herself. All Rose ever did was try to understand, and Garnet threw it back in her face. 

“I’m sorry,” the two both said at the same time, then froze uncertainly. After a pause Rose continued tentatively. 

“I am how I am. Just because they’re short lived doesn’t mean I don’t love them. But me loving them doesn’t mean I don’t love Pearl, or you Garnet,” She rested a hand gently on Garnet’s shoulder “You don’t have to feel left out or lonely Garnet. Whatever you need from me, it’s yours, just ask.” 

“You’re right,” Garnet shuffled closer to her friend and turned to look into her eyes. Rose had beautiful eyes, a pastel pink framed with thick jet-black lashes, glittering in the sunlight with unshed tears. 

“I have been lonely, Rose.” Garnet thought of Pearl’s tiny smile, the feel of their hands clasped together. She thought of Pearl hanging on Rose’s arm and forgetting the fusions existence in a moment, of constantly having to hear about Rose and be the one to comfort the pearl every time.

“I don’t want Pearl that way.” 

She didn’t realise how untrue that was until she spoke those words aloud and her chest ached in protest. 

“I miss us, Rose together,” and as the pink gem’s eyes lit up and she gently pulled Garnet in for a kiss, guilt and a terrible vindictive pleasure warred within the fusion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a short chapter, still easing my way back into writing after a hiatus.

She’d wanted to _kill_ her. Garnet had managed an icy silence as they warped back to the temple for Steven’s sake, but once she was finally alone in the temple she’d taken her frustrations out on a nearby wall and still fumed as she paced her room, hours after the events at the communication tower. 

Sometimes, like she’d told Steven while they were folding laundry together a few weeks ago, she could almost forget she was a fusion. Then there were times like now, when she could feel half of herself starting to shout and scream at the other. _I am a conversation._ But Garnet was turning into an argument. 

The day she’d faced the forced fusion cluster she’d been shaken to her core - simultaneously repulsed, infuriated, and horrified. She’d held herself as one somehow in the end, her component gems managing to keep it together despite their despair because of their love for one another and their shared love of the small half human boy who desperately needed her protection right then. She remembered losing herself for a second, the feeling of both Ruby and Sapphire speaking out of her mouth involuntarily, like she’d lost control of her own body, a puppet, and shuddered. They’d split apart in the temple afterwards, alone, with no one to witness her weakness. 

She wondered if splitting apart would be preferable to the betrayal she felt now. Presumably Ruby and Sapphire both felt as betrayed as Garnet did, their shared anger a common thread to keep the fusion together, but now Garnet had to deal with the realisation that Pearl (and Amethyst) only saw fusion as a tool to make herself feel stronger. It was the kind of attitude typical of most homeworld gems and she’d been forced to harden herself to it and hide her gems during her time before the rebellions, but it hurt more coming from someone she’d trusted. Loved even. 

Pearl was supposed to be different. Her and Rose and Amethyst. Garnet thought they understood. 

She clenched her fists as she looked back bitterly at how happy she’d felt just days ago. Ironically, Garnet was always so open during fusion, she had never expected Pearl to learn to hold things back. Ruby and Sapphire shared nearly all of their memories and feelings with each other, it was part of what made Garnet so stable, having all that knowledge and experience to draw on. Without communication, a fusion would never work long time. Incidents like this were bound to happen. 

Garnet growled and continued wearing down the stone floor in the circular path she stalked around the room. She knew if she stopped fuelling her anger she’d have nothing to distract her from the hollow ache in her chest.

One thing was for certain. She was _never_ fusing with Pearl again.

**Author's Note:**

> The idea was for this fic to tie in to From Afar then I remembered I accidentally deleted from afar last month when I was in a bad mood so...yeah maybe I'll restart that fic one day haha.


End file.
